Life getting crazy
You know, God's pretty amazing.
Do you ever stop to think about your life and what it's becoming? If you have, then you're probably like me, where once in a while you step back and wonder how things got so out of control and why you can't juggle what you thought you could or what you used to or whatever. You may have caught yourself saying things like, "I'm sorry I haven't __(fill in blank here)__, life's just gotten kind of nuts lately," or "Man, __(insert crazy life situation here)__ just came up, so I can't afford that right now," way more often than you ever intended or wanted.
I don't know about you, but as I was preparing to write this blog entry, I stopped and thought long and hard about those statements. I have friends who are quick to point out that I don't plan for the unexpected well enough when I make those statements. I have other friends who respond with the empathetic, "Yeah, I'm in the same boat. Sorry I can't help you with that, but __(yup, fill in the blank again)__." I wonder, if Abraham were alive today, would he blog about how he didn't expect to have to move so soon, and how that was a bit of an unexpected expense? Or did Hosea sit and talk with his friends about how "crazy" life's getting, what with his wife constantly being unfaithful and stuff like that? Did Moses ever sit around during his time in the wilderness and think, "Wow, how did everything get so messed up?"
Apparently they wrote this stuff down or told stories to pass it from generation to generation, or we wouldn't have it to look at today. But what I find amazing about these people is that they looked at their crazy lives and crazy issues and said, "Wow... how awesome is God!" Granted, the stories were probably written mostly after they saw God's hand in the midst of their financial distress or after they came through the "crazy times", but I get the feeling that they spent a lot more time realizing how things would be a whole lot worse if it weren't for God actively working in their lives.
There are so many places where you see what God has planned for His enemies, and places where His people don't listen or do what their told, so God uses circumstances to cause them to rely on Him again.
When I was a band director in my 5th year at Alexander, I had a meeting with the seniors in the marching band and gave them a peek into my complex battle plan to make the band the best it has ever been. One of the seniors, after sitting and listening to how much strategy and work I actually put into my decisions, said, "Wow... you actually sit and think about stuff like that? You're freaking brilliant!" or something to that effect.
I can't imagine what it would be like to sit in on God giving me a "sneak peek" at what He's planning on doing in my life and in the lives of others around me through the circumstances I find myself in. To be honest, I think most of us (myself included) get so wrapped up in our circumstances we don't look for God in them anymore, and just try to figure out what to do about the circumstance. All the while, God's up there going, "wait until you see what I'm going to do with __(insert crazy life situation here again)__! You wouldn't believe me if I told you and explained it to you!" Actually, I think if God really ever DID give me one of those "sneak peeks", I'd probably faint. Or maybe I'd try to do something different to avoid it. Who knows.
All that to say: I don't always know what God has in store for me. On days like today I feel like screaming and asking Him what the heck He's doing with/to me. But in the end, if I'm REALLY honest with myself and stop being so selfish for a moment, I KNOW that He's "freaking brilliant". I just need to shut up and look for Him around me and know that without Him intervening and correcting and guiding, I might actually get what I want, which in the end always leads to death. Which brings me back to:
You know, God's pretty amazing.